May 01 2008
A moment of truth in Beijing
Few might find it odd that my kids dislike China . The 2003 visit were kind of a disaster, in term of they didn’t learn Mandarin as I fully expected. Golfer predicted it, but I didn’t see that coming. I was so sure that a summer in Beijing they’ll return not just with fluent Mandarin, even loaded on the Beijing accent. I went so far as to sign them up at a local 10-day camp - Golfer joked that’s the labor camp. But unfortunately they were really young, couldn’t appreciate what Beijing had to offer. The only thing they saw were over crowded streets, rude people, smokers were everywhere, and they spitted liberally .. da list just went on.
I knew many friends here who’s child/ren loved going to China. They all have army of dotting grandparents, aunts and uncles to spoil. In this case, I lack all of the above. Once Pumpkin slipped as she walked into the bathroom. Instead of helping her up, or say something sympathetic, Xiaoyi just laughed. Pumpkin was pretty mad at that, told me quietly afterward. Xiaoyi doesn’t speak English, but Chinese would do, kid understands. I was there to see the episode, thought to myself, .. .. would I be dotting to other’s kid as they were my own? I sure would help out if some falls, and asked if they’re ok. Language isn’t the issue. The genuine concern translates into a facial expression or pasture, and the tone of voice will convey the message.
I found that the kids from the US are really slow and sweet (and innocent) compare to the kids in China - in a way like frog in a well - not necessarily a good thing, because they’ll have to face the world on their own soon, and compete fair footed. Pumpkin’s coaches keep saying that our kids (her group at the tennis league includes many areas) live in a bubble.
One day we were in the big yellow, McDonald. Pumpkin went to wash her hands at the sink. I went with her, waiting at distance behind. Pumpkin was slowly turned on the faucet and apparently aimlessly put her hands under the running water. As she was washing, a girl who’s head taller (than Pumpkin) came from behind, went straight to the single sink. Without a pause, used her left arm pushed Pumpkin away and putting her hands under the water. I could feel my blood rushing to my face. It would be very indecent, but my first instinct was to strike back at her the way she did to my daughter. The anger made me tensed for a second. Then I thought, kids need to learn .. regardless under pleasant or unpleasant circumstances. It’s part of growing up.
One time in the Zoo, (we saw an old man squatting, watched his grandson to drop a log in the open !!) my kids were side by side watching something in a crowd. I stayed behind them. Then there came a father who conveniently sat his little emperor on my children’s shoulders. I tapped on the man’s shoulder, he turned, “oh, they’re yours? 你叫他们让开了不就行了吗 ?” and then maneuvered into the spot my kids were about to be pushed out himself. Parked there grandly in now the vacant front row with his son in arms. I wanted to kick him.
Oh, you’ll love this one: at Aquarium near Gongren Sports Arena, in a darken room that showcasing the tropical fish, I suddenly heard King muttered, “oh, that’s nasty!” I turned around, saw a fashionable mother letting her little princess to pee right in front of the fish tanks. It happened, I caught up with her on the escalator soon after. I couldn’t help but asked her why on earth she’d allowed that?!?!?! Guess what, she was very poised, took a breath and replied, “oh, I didn’t see a bathroom.” I wanted to strike her too, but my kids held me back.
Last night in Beijing, after a hot pot dinner with the whole family, Jiujiu and Xiaoyi, etc. We were waiting to cross the road. Cars and bicycles didn’t stop for pedestrians where the traffic rules indicated. Not at all. King said to his sister quietly, “if we can cross this last one alright, we’ll make it home alive.” It was so as matter of fact, almost made me cry, and regret. This is my home town for Pete’s sake!! Not the wild amazon or jungle. .. Not a jungle? But crossing road was like fighting for you life. The phalanx of bikes and cars like water fall, never would break at the white checker section for those on foot. Even I was hesitated, looking for an opening that didn’t seem to occur. When I held up my arm against the traffic to shield my kids, the bikers would curse me! I wanted to scream back at those X#%&@*.. probably many were from the countryside. They made the Beijing I once knew so intimately now looked so primitive.
That’s 2003, before China launched the be-nice be-clean crusade, aiming at this up coming summer Olympic.
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